New York - Monkeys & Male Enhancement
Autumn 2009
Watching TV whilst travelling is something I never do but in New York it’s worth making an exception. The Maury Show puts Jerry Springer in Lala Fluffy Land. Yesterday’s theme was ‘Women who don’t obey must pay’ and featured three gibbering wrecks whose husbands did things such as locking them in the cellar with the dogs. One man even insisted his wife clean his teeth for him. The audience were screaming and baying for more. It’s the modern equivalent of Gladiators at the Coliseum. Future gore includes ‘If your 13 year old has had a baby, we’ll do a paternity test for you’.
The advertisements are just as much fun. Chantix promises to help stop smoking but warns that the side effects include manic depression, suicidal thoughts and life threatening skin reactions. Smoking sounds much safer. Enzyte offers ‘natural male enhancement’ by taking a daily pill. Included with your order is a free t-shirt which declares ‘Live Large’ so that you can let the world know you needed to grow your penis. Successful results will make you happy like their icon, ‘Smilin’ Bob’.
Lunch beckoned so off went the telly and a cab ride followed to The Monkey Bar on East 54th Street. Originally opening in 1934, this restaurant / bar has twice failed so London’s Wolseley owners, Chris Corbin and Jeremy King, in partnership with Vanity Fair editor, Graydon Carter, are hoping it’s third time lucky. The threesome has done a good job. The ambience, helped by a full-length mural along the back wall, successfully recreates the Monkey Bar’s jazz era roots, the service is excellent and the food sublime (and reasonably priced). Oddly, booking is only via email. It isn’t even possible to make a reservation at the restaurant.
Another good find was Vermilion. The food is described as a ‘confluence of Indian and Latin’ and does combine fascinating flavours. Located on the first floor of an office building in Madison Avenue, the ambience is cold. Floor to ceiling windows give excellent views of other office blocks despite the attempted distraction by huge hanging black & white photographs of a belly dancer.
The New York skyline at night continues to dazzle. An end of evening cocktail whilst gazing at the Empire State Building seems to be the perfect way to end a day in a city which is never dull.
The advertisements are just as much fun. Chantix promises to help stop smoking but warns that the side effects include manic depression, suicidal thoughts and life threatening skin reactions. Smoking sounds much safer. Enzyte offers ‘natural male enhancement’ by taking a daily pill. Included with your order is a free t-shirt which declares ‘Live Large’ so that you can let the world know you needed to grow your penis. Successful results will make you happy like their icon, ‘Smilin’ Bob’.
Lunch beckoned so off went the telly and a cab ride followed to The Monkey Bar on East 54th Street. Originally opening in 1934, this restaurant / bar has twice failed so London’s Wolseley owners, Chris Corbin and Jeremy King, in partnership with Vanity Fair editor, Graydon Carter, are hoping it’s third time lucky. The threesome has done a good job. The ambience, helped by a full-length mural along the back wall, successfully recreates the Monkey Bar’s jazz era roots, the service is excellent and the food sublime (and reasonably priced). Oddly, booking is only via email. It isn’t even possible to make a reservation at the restaurant.
Another good find was Vermilion. The food is described as a ‘confluence of Indian and Latin’ and does combine fascinating flavours. Located on the first floor of an office building in Madison Avenue, the ambience is cold. Floor to ceiling windows give excellent views of other office blocks despite the attempted distraction by huge hanging black & white photographs of a belly dancer.
The New York skyline at night continues to dazzle. An end of evening cocktail whilst gazing at the Empire State Building seems to be the perfect way to end a day in a city which is never dull.
Be Frank: agree or disagree? What do you think?
